kicked out of physical therapy....

I knew the day would come when Gina cleared me and told me my range of motion was where it needed to be and the hours of core and balance work had paid off and left me strong and ready to be cleared to do things I used to.  I knew we were working towards this, and we were close but THEN..... ugh.  my insurance benefits are such that i get 20 sessions of physical therapy per calendar year.  that's it. I guess it dosen't matter what you DO - or why you need them, but 20 better be enough.  I had already gone 27 times.  By the time billing caught up to the calendar it left me with $1,000 balance.  (i was paying a percentage of each visit - and then was billed 100% for the 7 they wouldn't cover)  So luckily Mountain Valley worked with me on the bill and we are paying it off over the next few months. The real bummer is - no more Gina.. no more neck adjustments. I loved my Tues and Thursdays - neck adjustments were the BEST!  I am doomed to be stiff and sore.  Thanks Humana for all you paid during my 120 some thousand dollar surgery - but could you not spare me a few more PT appointments until Gina cleared me?

four months already

Where is the time going.  I had lost count on how many weeks it had been and so I sat down with a calendar and just like that it has been 16 weeks!  E V E R Y T H I N G is going as it should be going.  I actually seem to be forgetting and remembering things at the same time - as time passes. (if that makes any sense)

I barely remember any pain associated with my surgery.  I forget how (or if) it was painful to turn my head.  I only remember on New Years Eve- being at a party and wishing I had a lazy susan so I could just be turned from one conversation to another so I didn't have to turn my head to see or talk.  So, it must have been uncomfortable.  I don't remember all those days in bed and the hours I slept.  I remember being sick and needing a change of scenery. I do remember Christmas, but not the other 17 days of Christmas vacation.

I don't remember not driving for those 6 weeks and what I did instead (having to rely on John or friends).  Off the top of my head I didn't realize how many people brought goodies, cards and meals.  When I look thru the pile of cards that stacked up on the shelf next to my bed, some I don't remember seeing and some jog my memory of  - "oh ya - she stopped by and was in my room" or "they left those awesome cookies.." "those chocolate covered marshmallow grahm cracker things" or "she took my girls that day for a play date"

And - all of those people that took their time to cook for us, 27 families!  I have a special thank you in the works.  I feel so in debt.  I am also still in shock that there are that many moms in my neighborhood with serious-cooking skills.  Makes me feel like I am missing an important skill that I am suppose to have. (I thought cooking was optional)

The feeling of having to be fragile and careful is leaving me.  I can handle a trip to Costco solo and $192 later I can get it all back home and put away (including cat litter) without needing a break or nap.  I am just more thoughtful of how I lift of move something.

My stamina has really turned the corner in the last 2 weeks.  I have gone from resting daily (laying down before my day is over) to maybe just going to bed earlier.  I am walking more with the changing spring weather and I am ready for a little vacation where just a few weeks ago I passed on the chance to do Disneyland for a day or two.  I could have never walked the park for a day.

This week I am celebrating my 4 months with pushing myself to do physical activity everyday and have gotten back on my spin bike this week.  Also eating and sleeping better.  I have gotten into some lazy habits with my activity and eating lately.  It is so easy to indulge before a surgery and during recovery -  I need to turn that switch off.

So in summary - of what I remember - it has been a pretty good four months!  I have done more then I thought I would be doing, and I did it all sooner.  I think I had some things in my favor (in no particular order - here it goes).

1. An excellent surgeon,

2. a super supportive husband & family,

3. a "village" - with the most supportive and thoughtful friends

4. a great physical therapist who i trusted and who pushes me hard,

5. a positive attitude and much gratitude for what i have

6. the ability to quickly get off my pain killers/muscle relaxers that were making me feel so out of my skin (without addiction/etc)  My recovery was faster without them.

7. Ariel, the energy healer.  WOW, without her - i actually can't even imagine getting to the hospital in one piece.  It really helped my mental status.

When people hear for the first time that I have had this surgery- their reaction is usually to tell me how sorry they are.  I respond by telling them that I was so lucky to have had this surgery and that I am in a much better place.  It also takes me back to the days early last fall when I counted down the days (twice) and wondered how the surgery would go.  The anticipation was 10 times worse for me then the actual recovery.  Recovering was a breeze in comparison.

4 months - see how my hair is growing to the left.. it's about to get annoying.